I have had glasses for 6 days now and I keep forgetting that.
I have gone almost 28 years without glasses and now I have to incorporate them into my life. And feel them on my face. My face is tired.
I feel like an alien.
And I don’t even wear them all day. They are for driving purposes, and seeing things across the room purposes. I take them off when I am at work, reading, or doing near-sighted things. If I wear glasses when I do those things, I feel like everything in my mind is broken. Like I am on a boat. And the boat is swaying.
So all this putting glasses on, and taking glasses off, has created some, er, problems.
When I left work on Tuesday, I left them on my desk. I got all the way back to my car (a 7 hour trek through the parking lot), and had to go all the way back. But I couldn’t go all the way back. Because after 5pm you have to have a password to get through 2 sets of doors. I don’t have an after hours code. I begged an old lady to let me through the first set of doors (“My glasses, I forgot my glasses, and I don’t have a code, and I’ve only had them for a few days, so…”). But I didn’t know the second set of doors (um, three feet away from the first set, literally) required a code too. So I stood between the two sets of doors and waited for someone else to leave. (“I’m standing here because…well, it doesn’t matter.”)
Yesterday, I was at someone else’s desk watching her do her job. Not in a strange way. I was supposed to. I am learning how to use a new system. I sat there staring at her screen. I thought, “It is so hard to see. I can’t see her screen. Oh. Yeah. I have glasses for this exact situation.”
I forgot them on my way out of work today, too. But I only turned one corner before I remembered. Progress!
Then I went outside and it was raining. I don’t know what happens to glasses when it rains, so I put them in my jacket.
“You just wipe them off with your shirt.” – Coworker.
Right.
And at what point on your nose are they supposed to rest? I know the very tip is off limits. That is for librarians and people who want to give you intimidating stares over the rim of their glasses.
Speaking of librarians,
Those chains that you can put on your glasses, so that you can’t ever forget them…the ones that let your glasses hang on your neck like a necklace…
Those were never cool, were they?
A chain just seems so functional and necessary for me, right now.
sayingthingsoutloud 
Haha allison how are you a part of our family and so unfamiliar with glasses? blows my mind. i can answer any of those questions for you. i wear glasses all day every day.
Allison, you are cracking me up. If you get a chain, I will support you. I will still be your friend.
I can’t believe that you don’t need to wear them all the time like the rest of us. Get the chain….the probably have some very stylish ones now. And you are cool no matter what.