Wordsmith

I spent one college summer in Hawaii. Working. Summer missionaryizing.

I have a scrapbook, yes a scrapbook, from my time there. I felt like looking at it tonight. There is a printout of a hilarious e-mail that a friend in Texas sent me when I was there. I am not sure why I considered that scrapbook material, but I now transcribe the funny parts of it here for the enjoyment of all.

“Well, I was typing up a fairly long reply to this when I absentmindedly clicked a link someone sent me on AIM and I lost the whole reply. I’ll try my best to create a worthy replica.

…If anyone can help those old hippies, it’ll be you, what with your constant cheerfulness underscored by a deep seated world-weary cynicism…

The fruit lady sounds neat. Take pictures of her with a rifle in one hand, and a mango in the other. What a dichotomy!

…That pretty much hits all the major points of my previous reply, but I didn’t feel like taking the time to phrase the whole thing as an epic rhyme in iambic pentameter this time. Your loss, really.”

My friends are the funniest.

“The fruit lady” was a woman I stayed with for two weeks. She grew 10-15 different types of fruit in her spacious backyard. She also had a problem with wild hogs, and shot them with a rifle. She would then offer the hog up to the first friend to come and get it. She chopped fruit down with a machete. On my first night with her, she brought out her wedding album. She’s divorced. So, of all the people I stayed with that summer (4 families?), she was the most entertaining.