Wide Awake

– There are a lot of good ideas on TV. One (from a new show, Brooklyn Nine-Nine) is to leave a sign on my desk that says “Gone Leavin” when I go on a break at work. How ridiculous!

– Winter. What did we do to deserve this.

– Dystopian literature for teenagers. I am a fan. I am reading the “Divergent” series. It is a wonderful, easy-to-understand story about how the problems created by a corrupt government or nation should not (and cannot) be solved by using the exact same tactics as that corrupt government or nation. Or terrorist organization. For an easy-to-read adult version of the series, please read “Animal Farm” by George Orwell.

– I have a new duplex-mate. She does not seem to have a dog, or pet of any kind. [Enter chorus of angels singing here]. This means no pee on the porch. No barking at 6am. All we have to deal with is Jack, the neighborhood cat. And the occasional fox.

– I’m going to try to put on my insightful pants. Humor me. I have a friend who agreed to meet me at the gym at 5:30am three times a week. I’m not a morning person. But. I can handle the time of day. (The cold weather makes me want to break things, though). Instincts, habits, behaviors, feelings…they can all change over time, can’t they? I get so used to reacting to life in a certain way, that I am tempted to continue to react that way – even when my instincts, habits, behaviors, and feelings have actually changed. When my alarm goes off, I want to say to myself: “You should snooze the crap out of that, and go back to bed. You are too tired for the world right now.” But that’s not really true, anymore. I shouldn’t try to use a knife or scramble eggs in the morning, but I can zone out on an elliptical machine. I’ve changed. I can do it. I’m used to snoozing, so I am tempted to snooze. It’s not really my true feeling, though. I snoozed today, and laid there for an hour. Wide awake. I went to bed early last night, so I could wake up early. I should have denied my old nature the desire to snooze, and gotten out of bed. I think it is the same way when Jesus changes pieces of our old natures. We’re used to the flesh. I think sometimes when I make a decision with my flesh, it doesn’t even feel like me anymore. I do it out of habit. I do it because I’m used to that way. But I’m awake in the life of Christ, and I don’t need to sleep in my old nature anymore. Wide awake.

1 thought on “Wide Awake

Leave a reply to Emily Cancel reply